Sunday 27 January 2013

MUA Fur Effect Nails review

WHAT IS THIS MADNESS??

As a few of you may know, I spend a fair amount of my time writing complimentary/cutting words about music and dance for a couple of magazines and newspapers. I enjoy it, and don't think I'm too bad at it.  However, I don't think I've ever done a product review before - mostly because I never buy anything - so the following few paragraphs could all go a bit tits up and descend into verbal madness. Given my feelings on the subject, I'd say there's about a 79% chance of that happening. Oh well. Here goes...

I've been intrigued by this so-called Fur-Effect nail malarkey ever since pictures of the tantalisingly bright little pots were first bandied about over Twitter a few weeks ago. So on my way home from work I stopped by Superdrug and decided to find out what all the fuzz fuss was about for myself.

BIG mistake.

This could well be the worst three pounds I have ever spent in my life. Worse, even, than the time I bought 'just one more pint of cider' and ended up crawling out of the pub with my head in a bucket. Think I'm exaggerating? Think again.



Oh MUA, where to start? Your lipglosses are usually spot-on, and your shade 4 blusher is the one constant in my make-up bag. Who in their right mind made the decision to market this box of tat? I'll outline the errors for you in bullet-point form, so maybe the appropriate steps can be taken towards modifying this product/removing it from store shelves and taking great care to ensure that it's never seen again.

  • As many bloggers have already highlighted, the 'ingenious' sifter design actually just limits access to the damn fluff, resulting in muchos pot-shaking, base-bashing and grumblings galore. A frustrating ordeal in itself.
  • Once the fluff has been released from its plastic prison, getting it from lid to nail is an exercise in mental self-injury for two reasons. 1) No matter what angle you approach it from, your thumb will always end up half-covered and the rest will have to be patted on with your finger. 2) The fact that your nail varnish needs to be still-wet in order for the fluff to stick also makes this a very messy procedure indeed.
  • Call me old-fashioned, but when I see a product that advertises 'fur-effect', I expect said product to at least vaguely match up to its claim. MUA Fur-Effect Nails do make me look like I've glued fuzzy felt to my fingers. They do, when glanced at, look a fair bit like the residue left on one's hands when one has spent a day at the funfair demolishing a 1kg bag of candyfloss. They do, as Oli kindly pointed out, "look like a badly-disguised fungal infection." What they don't look like is BLOODY FUR. 
I can totally see what MUA were trying to achieve with this fluzzle/fluffle/whatever crap. In theory, fur-effect nails sound AWESOME. Even though they obviously weren't going to look like a sleek kitty coat, I'd hoped that they would at least be a refreshingly uber-matte, uber-chic antidote to metallics. It doesn't work. In their vague attempt to ride this current wave of nail-mania and push the boat out even further, MUA have surfed one break too far and created the manicure equivalent of a much-used shower mat. Nice idea, very poor execution.

Hang on, Oli's starting to look a bit concerned.

"You're not seriously going to leave that on, are you?"

No. No I'm bloody not. Over and out, compadres!


Betti Baudelaire xxx



7 comments:

  1. This made me laugh so much! I totally agree with you and I have never succumbed to the 'fuzzy' mani! For some reason it just goes through me. I can't help imagine what they would look like after a shower all wet and soggy :S not a good look haha xx

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  2. Thanks for the honest opinion! Saved me some pounds here, may as well run my wet polish through my cats fur it seems haha


    http://samispoon.blogspot.co.uk

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  3. Yeah I really don't get this either, it's just strange.

    How about following each other? Let me know on my blog!

    /Avy

    http://mymotherfuckedmickjagger.blogspot.com

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  4. Love this post.

    Fluffy nails were around in the nail community about two years ago when tech's started buying coloured fluff from HobbyCraft and patting it onto there nails. It looked fluffy... it was a fluffy mani.

    Maybe they should re name it or just not bother at all as I think the brand itself is a waste of space..

    Lora xx

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  5. HAHAHA!!! Best blog post yet!! I think you should review products more! Your writing skilzz are amazing, having me giggling and imagining all sorts every sentence!!!!

    I knew this stuff would be bad, but not that bad..!!! The biggest worry I had for you is 'HOW THE DEVIL ARE YOU GOING TO REMOVE IT!??' Shocking shocking product. I agree, get it off the shelves and save your nails while you still can!!!!!!!!!!!

    I'm so sorry your nails have been violated, I blow you virtual kisses to make them better!

    Adios Amigos! ;) xxxx

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  6. Hahah this review cracked me right up!! love it. I know the feeling.
    Look forward to meeting you at the Bristol Meet up xxx

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  7. Not only humerous but true! I too was going to write a review but my mum told me if you can't say anything good don't say anything at all and since it would be a bitch fest I opted out. You however have struck a good balance of humour and brutal honesty, well done x

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